Anyone smell something???

I think that I should be followed by a camera for America's Funniest Retards. My life seems like it is one flop after another. Imagine the most horrible smell you have EVER smelled..... OK you got it??.... Now multiply that by a billion... Keep that stench in your mind as I tell you this story. It was a typical week at the Holcomb House you know work-home-work-home. On one of my trips to the store I bought the cat some different kind of cat food because I haven't taken the time to go to Wal-Mart which is the only place that sells the kind that he (the cat) likes. Anyways he was just having to eat it or starve is all I had to tell him. Now all of you who have met FAT CAT know that he is most definitely not into starving. So of course he ate it. Well I noticed over the next few days that the utility room began to smell... I was like man that cat food has done a number on him because his litter box is pretty stinky... Of course I changed the litter box and the smell got better the next day... Then the day after that the smell was back and I thought Lord now I can't afford to change that litter box every other day... That's just too much... Well by this time its Friday night and the smell is faint but you can tell that its there... I am a 9 o'clock bedtime person... I know that's bad but that is just the way that I am.... On this particular Friday night I was working and burning the midnight oil literally doing scrapbook pages for the t-ball team that Phillip coached this time. We wanted to do something really special for all of the players so I took the task on of doing 12x12 pages for each one. I also placed them in frames and they turned out really really good. Anyway by the time that I finished with them all it was 1 in the morning or so. Needless to say I was really tired oh and by the way Phillip wasn't home. I had to get our clothes ready for the next morning because we had ball pictures at 11 so I went to put clothes in the wash. Now I never throw my clothes in front of the washer I just usually have it ready to put them in but for some reason this time I threw them in the floor. As I was loading the washer I saw out of the corner of my eye an empty plug in. Now to some of you that means nothing but to me it meant that someone must have plugged the freezer up in a different socket... So as I slowly turned my head to look praying that I was wrong, there it was .... no little red light on the front of my BRAND NEW freezer and another empty plug in... Yep you guessed it the freezer was unplugged!!!!!!! Did you get the point that Phillip was not home???.... So I did what anyone would do in my position, I slowly opened the freezer but QUICKLY shut it back before all of the BLACK FOG could escape... The cat was NOT the cause of the odor in my utility room is was the freezer that had about 200 to 300 dollars worth of meat in it... Well I did the only thing that I knew to do, I ran got the outside trash can and put it to the end of the steps and was just hauling it out the door.. Now I thought that I had asked my sweet baby girl to help me but she was no where to be found.. I ran into the living room and found her curled up in the corner of the couch begging me not to make her help. She was saying "Mom I cant please I cant I cant" My sweet son was asleep but was yanked out of a deep sleep by a steamy stinky fog that now filled my house and began to yell "mom what is that nasty smell mom please"... I am telling you it was HORRIBLE... I had a towel wrapped all the way around my face and the only thing showing were my eyes and they were full of tears because I soooooo did not want to have to clean that up... I finally got all of the nasty meat out of the freezer and then proceeded to clean the three inches of blood that was in the bottom... It was the most disgusting thing I have ever had to do and I have had to do some pretty bad stuff in my life... When I finished with everything I went outside and pulled the garbage can back away from the steps and back where it always sits to bake in the 90 degree southern sun for the next few days until the garbage man ran on the Monday morning. Now in hind site I should have placed a little caution note on the can but you know I wasn't thinking of anyone but myself and what I had just went through. So my poor poor garbage man got nothing in the way of a warning for what loomed beneath the lid of that can. I just so happened to be home on Monday morning to see the retrieval of my trash and like a sneaky little school kid I could be found peeking out my bedroom window laughing. When he rolled the can out and lifted the lid a GIGANTIC black cloud of flies and other vermin exploded out of the can. Of course he jumped back and as he was feverishly pressing the lift button the smell came.. Now I know what it smelled like before it baked for the days prior to his arrival so I am certain that it was RIPE!.. I don't know if the thought of someone else having to experience what I went through was what I found so amusing or just the facts themselves. I was rolling with laughter and well he probably could hear the roar coming from my house but I could not help it. To me that was HILARIOUS!

"KEY"tastrophy

Ok... For all of you who know me well, you know that I am NOTORIOUS for loosing my keys. Well it happened again. Yesterday was of course a hetic day because my life has somehow turned into one whirlwind after another. I feel as if I have been sucked into a vortex of neverending tasks. Anyways, yesterday after leaving work "late" I went to my moms. Thank the good Lord she had dinner ready. Well after I ate Mish and I headed home because we were to pick up Preston later at Phillip's Mothers. Well I had to get all the animals fed and begin my work day at home. Well the time came for me to go get my son and well my keys were GONE. All of you who live near where I do, you know that it was raining. I have learned that when you loose your keys the best thing to do is retrace your steps. Well all of my steps were OUTSIDE. So picture this... pourning rain, dark, muddy, and did I mention dark and raining, my sister in her car with the head lights shinning in my yard and me outside getting soaked looking for my keys. It was a lovely sight! Well after all of that, my search was invain. My search then went back to the inside of the house, which I was SURE they were not. Again my search turned up nodda... Sooo then I had to call Phillip and tell him that I once again lost my keys... Of course he was not understanding about it... His comments were "Dadblame, I put an extra clicker in the house because your keys were always locked in the car. I guess now I am gonna have to put an extra key in there too because you can't keep up with them." As you can imagine I was just about shot because it was waaayyy past my nine o'clock bedtime, so I just gave up and went to bed. Well this morning I got up early to continue my search outside (and yes I did look in the car and they were not there). After a long search through the yard, NOTHING. So I just gave up and went back into the house. I was so frustrated. I went to the bathroom to get a load of laundry. On my way back through the house I stomped my toe on a live plant that I have that sits right under the bar. Well needless to say that was a shot to my face cause now I have no keys and I am gonna have to ride the fourwheeler to work in the rain and I have hurt my toe... Somewhere in the middle of my temper tantrum I heard the noise. You know the noise that keys make when they are shaken. I look down and low and behold there they were a shinning shimmer of hope in the plant!... Thank the good Lord for small miracles!!!

Just a glimpse of our home!

To all of you who might be interested in what has been going on between the four walls of the Holcomb house. Get ready this may be a bumpy ride.

My family has had many additions to it this past year. I hear the gasp, no I have not been secretly pregnant nor did we adopt any children without anyone knowing...lol... Phillip and I are very happy with the two WONDERFUL children that GOD has blessed us with... The additions however have came to us in the form of PETS... yes I did say pet with an "s". This past year I must have been completely insane because I allowed my children to spend their chore money on WHATEVER they chose...(attention parents: there should be a contract on the useage of chore money... read carefully and you will see why) The chore money story begins with three characters
1. My sister Leeanne
2. My son Preston
3. My neice Anna
more characters come in later... let us begin
ok picture this... my sister and her daughter and my son go the our local pet store. my phone rings... i hear my sisters voice saying preston wants to spend his money on a rabbit.. i say ok thats fine... so about an hour later my son comes in with a small baby rabbit... two hours later my daughter gets off the bus and she comes in and preston shows off his new prize... great now mish wants to spend her money on a pet and right away i realize that i should have put limits on the chore money. so off goes leeanne, anna, preston, and mish to the pet store... an hour later, they traveling side show returns with... another rabbit... so now i have two rabbits... but keep in mind i NEVER remembered to put limits on the money and my children have chore money due them EVERY week. That evening i realize hmmm nobody spent their money on a cage... so i keep the rabbits in a tote in the kids bathroom overnight. The rabbits are so cute and cuddly and sweet but then i realize by searching the internet that hmmm they are a "special" breed of rabbits that have to stay between 60-75 degrees or they die. Now i know that some of you are thinking there is the answer to your rabbit problems... put them out and let nature take its course. Well i could not do that so off we go the next day to walmart to find a cage for them. Well i end up buyin a kennel type thing, you know the one for a HUGE dog. So we get home and phillip and i put it together and put the adorable little rabbits in there "together". There our rabbit problem resolved... HA... well a smart parent would have taken their chore money to pay for the $40 kennel but oh well let us continue. One IMPORTANT fact that i forgot to mention is that my neice has gotten a hampster in the midst of all this rabbitry. So now we are 2 parents, 2 children, and 2 rabbits, because like noah my family has to be balanced. Now about a week or so rocks on and now its another trip to the pet store to get food for the rabbits and my sister's hampster... Ring ring ring... my sisters voice... preston wants to spend his money on a hampster. (hmm well seeing hows i didnt put the limits on the money) was the thought ran threw my mind as I hear my voice speaking i suppose but go ahead and get the cage and get mish one bright idea huh?... we will use the same cage... HA... Those of you who know me, know that NOTHING in my life is simple...by the time the hampsters get to the office they are fighting so we now have to buy another cage.... so now we have 2 parents, 2 children, 2 rabbits, and 2 hampsters. Now if you dont already know, this is in addition to the cat that was given to me and my winnie dog scooter whom my dearest aunt gave me and the two horses we already had. In my mind i think hmmm well we now have a petting zoo, all that is missing are the goats... ok so we are content now right.... HA... so here goes... bored yet? As we all know the trips to the pet shop are havin to be more frequent because of all the feed and bedding that has to be bought. Well to make a long story shorter, a couple of weeks roll by and well we became the proud owners of 2 guinea pigs... ok so by this time i have told my children that there will be absolutely no more pets in the Holcomb household.
well hmmm remember the rabbits and the part about them being in the same cage, which is not the same kennel cage but is one that rolls..(thank you katy).... well we now have an adorable baby rabbit....lol
so scooter now sleeps in the kennel at night because he gets into lots and lots trouble while everyone but the one cracked out hampster that runs on the wheel every night sleeps snug in their beds. Just ask Katy how annoying that wheel can be..lol... well with a move of the petting zoo into the utility room so the zoo area can be used for jewerly party the cracked out hampster keeps scootie awake at night therefore signing his death wish because he (the cracked out hampster) is now in hampster heaven because scootie broke into the cage and kilt him dead.... now the other lazy hampster who never runs on anything is still alive and his cage was right beside the grave of the other.... so i know in scooties sweet little winnie mind, he said to the hampster "you have kept me up for the last time".... "say hello to our maker"....lol
Trust me i know your year has held many more exciting and interesting events than mine but i just wanted to let you know just how pathetic my life really is...lol... not really look at how much LIFE i am surrounded by!

To my best friends... I hope this was worth the wait!